What About Words?

I am the mom of 3 "special needs" adopted daughters, so I have spent much of life learning a different language. The words:tone, Rocker bottom foot, short term auditory memory delay, mentally challenged, fetal alcohol syndrome, autism and, the list goes on and on. As I joined or formed support groups or became a part of councils and boards, I learned other different words: SMA, cystic fibrosis, feeding tube, nebulizer, oxygen, rhizotomy, It is like we, special need parents used a different language. You know what though, we also have the same language: happy, laugh, love, pride, and cry, tears, sadness, it is all there. I think that we should not focus so much on what makes our kids different because, we lose what is the same; what conforms us to every other parent and family in the world instead of what separates us and excludes our kids.

We say that our kids are not included, yet sometimes, we keep them excluded by the differences we seem to stress. Recently, I saw one of the kids I have come to know on Facebook at a birthday party. Yes, she was different yet, she was also very much the same. Instead of stressing her differences, she was just being a little girl, playing Barbies the best way she could, helping the birthday girl open up presents...okay, I know, there are many of our kids who can't even do that but, just their mere presence adds meaning to those who's lives they touch.

The reason for this post is pretty simple, my girls were 8, 2 and 8 months when they came into our lives, they are now 34, 29 and 26 so I have had many years to see that they excel (as do the people around them) in an environment where those words that stress the differences are kept at a minimum. In this instance, the more they are different the less they are the same. My hope is that all of our kids grow up to be unique and that their communities accept them much in the same way as they would the tall, short, redhead, blonde, etc. and we are able to join together to help each other be all that we can be! Wishing you all an awesome year ahead!!

[caption id="attachment_7123" align="aligncenter" width="350"]My Daughters, Laura-Lee in White Dress and Nikki in Black. ~2004[/caption]